Tuesday, January 5, 2016
Saudade= where I am at the moment. Trying to find my place in my world. Saudade. If I ever have a desire for a tattoo, this is the word that I would use. I guess I would place it on the ring finger- it's about the only place that hasn't or won't sag as the rest of my body has in the past few years. Sau-da-de~Is the nostalgia when you are missing/longing/yearning for something or someone that is gone (or happened), a lingering memory....I am not in a depression-but that feeling is always hanging around. I feel sad that my Sister didn't see her only Grandchild get married or become a great Grand mother.That Hubby also missed so much already. Soon I will experience being alone in my home. Children will have moved on and another change that I will have to deal with. In a funny way I am looking forward to finding out just how I will handle it all.....
Tuesday, November 11, 2014
The first date palms planted on the Farm was in 1919. There were about 8 palms lined in front of the orchard, in front of the family home. Spending a lot my childhood on the farm, date season was the favorite time of the year. First date picking/eating was September. As long as there were dates on the tree and the birds were kept at bay, we were all in date heaven! When the trees were to tall to climb, we would line the ground with old irrigation tarps, shake the trees until all the ripe ones would fall. We always saved just enough for Grandmother to make date desserts. Now I pay $9.99 per lb. at our local health food store...missing the old days.....
Friday, September 19, 2014
On Sept 4, 2014, I lost my husband of 38 years. He fought the battle of cancer for 5 years. It was bittersweet, losing him, but wanting his suffering to stop...... A well attended memorial, he would have been humbled by it all. Don was the only person I have ever known to always speak the truth, he never wore a mask, and he was what you saw. A man of many talents, a decent man, but most important, he had common sense. I loved him and he loved me.
I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith. 11Timothy 3-7
Saturday, July 19, 2014
Loving Monsoon season!
I found this in my drafts. Never got around to publish it. Sister had just lost her Hubby and was having a hard time after his death. She would stay with me when the grief became hard for her to bear..
Sis spent the night -first time in over 50 years- she found out how I really live. I am a closet hoarder-there I said it!! She told me it was time to get organized!! Now how she expects a 69 yr. old dyslexic, scattered, ADHD person to change is beyond me! I always wanted to be able to know where anything I needed would be in a proper place. Believe me I have tried, but always get so stressed I have to take a break .Most breaks lasted years.. She should have worked on me years sooner! We stared in the kitchen and this is what came out of my top cabinet's.
All this on the counter tops and island have been stored for years. At the least, 99 % of the stuff was never used. She ask why I keep all these things . Some of the things I just liked, were old, belonged to my Grandmother, some were gifts and others were just a darn good bargain. She told me that each piece that I wanted to keep, had to be displayed and if not then I had to get rid of it! That is how I was able to give it up. I didn't find any that I really wanted to keep out except a sugar jar. I loved this little jar. I kept it on display for a few days. I got tired of looking at it, didn't match my décor, but couldn't make myself donate it, so I hid it on the top shelf in the very back where she wouldn't see it. Think of that, only one piece out of all the mess that I wanted to keep! This is going to be fun after all! It sure felt like a huge burden lifted from me-a burden I never knew existed!
Saturday, July 12, 2014
the cracks on the patio!
Not getting outside much. Hubby has finished all options for fighting his cancer. Hospice nurse comes to our home twice a week....... .
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
Thursday, November 7, 2013
With great sadness and a broken heart, I come to tell you that my sister Aiyana passed away September 27, 2013. You know by her very popular blog ( Water When Dry) ironically her last post entry was titled -Time to say Goodbye. She died of complications from surgery. Sadly her beloved husband passed away four months earlier. My sister was two years older that me and that made her "THE BOSS." I depended on her for the answers to all my life's questions. She became a expert in everything that interested her and that was almost everything! Our family is still in the denial stage- after all, she was "larger than life"- how could this happen????.
To everything there is a season,
A time for every purpose under the heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;